Sorry for the lack of update as of late, school and work has been keeping me incredibly busy lately. And for once, I'm putting school above most everything.
Classes are going well, I'm looking forward to Winter Break for obvious reasons. I'm taking a mini-vacation the weekend before Thanksgiving (if you can call a horse show a vacation, which I do being that it's a weekend I won't have to work and I'll be able to hopefully have some sort of fun. Success too. Yes, having a successful weekend would be extremely nice too). And the weekend of Thanksgiving, I plan on attending a horse show to be a spectator (10 bucks says I get put to work on that one). I digress. I am enjoying my pre-Calculus class, because for some reason, math classes make me feel brilliant sometimes. It's one class I finally don't have to work extremely hard at to understand, though I've found that as I get closer to Calculus, a little bit of studying does go a long way as far as tests go. We had a quiz today in which I completely blanked on something I knew, and Tuesday we have a test. Which means that besides the time I am at work or celebrating tomorrow's (today's) "holiday," I will be attempting to do some homework for class.
Work.. hmm.. I'm still teaching one night a week at the horse stable, which has its benefits. I am finally out of debt there (moving my horse played a giant role in this) and now actually receive a monthly check. I can not wait to receive this month's check, as I know it will be good and will help me out for that vacation of mine. As far as the pharmacy gig is going, I'm still attempting to get more pharmacy tech hours. Working up front as a cashier is fun, great, and has its benefits (getting paid mostly) but I want the experience of working in a pharmacy. There MAY be an opening to work full time back in the pharmacy, but I am still crossing my fingers that it will work out.
I can't wait for my mini "vacation."
Friday, October 31, 2008
Saturday, October 18, 2008
It's All About Me
I'm absolutely tired of being walked over.
Anything I do, if I make it about me, I'm selfish. However, if I let it be about someone else, I'm selfish, rude, or just an all out bitch.
What the hell. It is apparent to me that the more self-assured a woman is, the more she is considered to be a bitch. Because she can stand on her own two feet and doesn't need a man to protect her. Inside of everyone is a person who wants to be liked and wants to be wanted, or loved, or whatever.
But the outside? The person on the outside is a shell, rock hard and so hard to get into.
Well... Finally, I've reached the point where things are going to be about me. I'm tired of trying to make everyone else happy because all it does it make me unhappy sometimes. I would give someone the shirt off my back because I am that type of person. But in trying to be nice, I feel like it gives people the impression that I will bow down to what they want. WRONG.
There are people I love to death that none of this applies to, but those people have come through for me time and time again. I would not be who I am today if not for them, and for that I am extremely grateful and would give them the shirt off of my back because that truly is who I am. It takes a lot for me to think highly enough of someone to totally let them in. I put walls up to see who's worth being in my life because it protects my sense of self a lot better than just totally be nothing but open about everything.
But for now, I'm just going to let things be about me. I don't give a damn about what someone I don't really know thinks about me. Time to be selfish for awhile....
Anything I do, if I make it about me, I'm selfish. However, if I let it be about someone else, I'm selfish, rude, or just an all out bitch.
What the hell. It is apparent to me that the more self-assured a woman is, the more she is considered to be a bitch. Because she can stand on her own two feet and doesn't need a man to protect her. Inside of everyone is a person who wants to be liked and wants to be wanted, or loved, or whatever.
But the outside? The person on the outside is a shell, rock hard and so hard to get into.
Well... Finally, I've reached the point where things are going to be about me. I'm tired of trying to make everyone else happy because all it does it make me unhappy sometimes. I would give someone the shirt off my back because I am that type of person. But in trying to be nice, I feel like it gives people the impression that I will bow down to what they want. WRONG.
There are people I love to death that none of this applies to, but those people have come through for me time and time again. I would not be who I am today if not for them, and for that I am extremely grateful and would give them the shirt off of my back because that truly is who I am. It takes a lot for me to think highly enough of someone to totally let them in. I put walls up to see who's worth being in my life because it protects my sense of self a lot better than just totally be nothing but open about everything.
But for now, I'm just going to let things be about me. I don't give a damn about what someone I don't really know thinks about me. Time to be selfish for awhile....
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)