Learning to Let Go

I've been looking up quotes lately, mostly for Facebook status updates and such. I came across this one and it made me think (scary, I know).

Even though you may want to move forward in your life, you may have one foot on the brakes. In order to be free, we must learn how to let go. Release the hurt. Release the fear. Refuse to entertain your old pain. The energy it takes to hang onto the past is holding you back from a new life. What is it you would let go of today?
-- Mary Manin Morrissey

This quote got me thinking. How many times do I hold on to one thing after it happens? Some customer yells at me (which reminds me, a retail rant post is coming soon), I talk about it for days. A friend makes a mistake, I let it fester until I burst and have to say something. How long can I go on about a friend who made the ultimate mistake - said some horrible and awful things about me and what she said got back to me. I think with me, I don't let go of things easily enough. I let it become a bigger issue, when if I just say what needs to be said, I can get over it and move on.

I guess it's just about figuring when it's best to just let it GO (to an extent- there are things I feel that should be held on to, like morals and values and if someone really did something completely nasty. Forgiveness is a gift, but only if the party is deserving). I think letting go is important in moving on but unfortunately it's hard to let go without closure.

Two years ago, I had a very close friend who said some awful things about the clothes I were and just my general appearance. I had some pretty big self confidence issues growing up, and at that point in time was a complete tomboy. Hoodies, a tee, and jeans? Yes, please! What bothered me about this was that she couldn't say it to my face. Instead she opted to say it behind my back, to a mutual "friend" (read: frienemy) who later told me. I confronted her about it, she said she wasn't the only one saying it. Long story short, we had a falling out over this. I had a hard time getting past this, I remember, mostly because I couldn't totally get my opinion out.

Later that year, I ended up running into above friend at a concert. We had some words, I said what needed to be said. I don't know if I could have let it go without that closure. Now we see each other from time to time, and while we are not close friends, we can catch up and at the very least reminisce about the old days.

Which begs the question, when is it best to just let something go and when is it okay to make a big deal of it?